6 Questions To Help You Combat Depression

Today Wednesday 10th October 2018 is World Mental Health Day this year. In this day and age, mental health is a subject that we should all engage in. Gone are the days when it was taboo to mention let alone acknowledge that one has a mental problem. This year alone, I think I can count over five people I know who have lost their lives due to mental health issues. With the onset of online technologies in spite of the benefits they afford us, we have also seen many pressures that have unfortunately led to the loss of lives.

Depression is one of the most common mental health diseases. Recently I listened to one of my favourite podcasts by Amy Porterfield. The title of the episode was Dealing with Depression as an Entrepreneur. Amy hosted Jasmine Star who shared candidly about her own struggle with depression. Jasmine rightly stated that each of us has at one time or another dealt with depression. She drew the distinction between clinical depression where you have to take medication for the disease and situational depression where you once in a while experience the blues. Although it is a long time since I experienced clinical depression, I occasionally have to deal with the blues especially if I am going through a situation that is outside of my comfort zone. I struggle with fear of failure and each time I experience a new situation it really takes a toll on me.

When not dealt with, situational depression can result is suicidal behaviour. Usually, this happens when a person feels like they have no other option in life. Unfortunately, social media contributes a lot to situational depression. Often, people are left thinking that the world is all rosy for everyone else except them. According to www.amenclinic.com, “most suicidal thoughts are brief in duration. Suicide is possible when someone gets locked into negative thoughts and has a short fuse and problems with impulsivity”.

Jasmine quoted Dr Daniel Amen’s book Change Your Brain, Change Your Life. She said Dr Amen draws a distinction between the mind and the brain. The mind is what governs our thoughts and the brain is the organ that executes what the mind tells it to do. For example, if you wake up in the morning and immediately think about how gloomy the weather is and how that is going to cause you to have a bad day, guess what that is what you will have a bad day. This is because this is what your mind is thinking about and everything that happens to you that day will appear to be bad. The reverse is true. If you wake up and immediately declare how you are going to have a great day this is what will happen to you.

Given the fact that our thoughts determine how we feel and the results we eventually get, Dr Amen came up with a series of questions that you can ask yourself to help you get out of a situation that would have led to depression.

# 1. Ask yourself what is the one thing that is bothering you?

Usually, when depression sets in, it feels like the world is coming to an end. When you take time to critically name the thing that is causing you heartache and immediately WRITE IT DOWN. It forces you to give thought to what the problem is and this leads us to question 2.

# 2. Is It True

When you ask this question, you immediately begin to see things from a different perspective. At this stage things maybe blear. This is why you need to move to question 3.

# 3. If it is true. Are you 100% certain of its truth

I love this question because in most cases we give weight to things which although they may appear true when you dig deep there is often no truth in them. Over the years, I am learning that what we may think is the truth is often not true once we put it on the truth barometer. As you critically examine that which is causing you heart ache, you will discover that in most cases, it fails this truth test.

# 4. How Does this make you feel?

Maybe what is bothering you is true and you have established that it is 100% true. The next question is to ask yourself how you feel now that you know this truth. In most cases, you will get answers like scared, inadequate etc. This is normal and all of us get these emotions. However, if you allow yourself to stop at this stage you will fail and give in to the blues that are threatening to consume you. That is why question 5 is very essential.

# 5. Will those feelings keep you from the purpose you have to fulfil in this world?

One think for certain is that as long as we live in this world we should expect to get bad feelings from time to time. I am often reminded of the scripture in John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world”.

Feeling scared or like we have failed etc. should never intimidate us. We have to always keep the end in mind and remember the purposes we have to fulfil here on earth. Our life purposes should be bigger than the fears that we face along the way to living out our purposes here on earth. This leads us to the final question.

# 6. What would happen if you allowed yourself to feel the opposite of what you are feeling now?

I like what Amy Ingariat recently said to me in an email. “As long as there is life, there is hope”. This is the attitude we should carry when situational depression pops its face in our lives. We should always try to look for the best case scenario however small it may appear to be and let this carry us through the dark days. When we have life, we can be certain that better days lie ahead. Pull through the dark clouds or like Jasmine said to look for that circle of friends who will dance with you through the dark clouds until it begins to rain blessings into your life.

Finally,

If you or someone you know is going through a depression be it clinical or situational, I would encourage you to speak out and seek help. They say “a problem shared is half solved” and this has a lot of truth in it. Do not allow the dark days of depression to consume you. Sometimes all you need is to talk to a therapist or get a prescription that will help you come out of that pit. We can ALL beat mental health and live a fulfilled life.